There are certain things you do in order to avoid Middle-of-the-night Kid hysteria, which all involve different ways of compromising your own dignity. I’ve written about bed acrobatics before. These days we play Musical Beds where Kid shows up in the middle of the night to sleep in the big bed and one of us (my partner) leaves immediately to sleep in the bed downstairs. The cat sleeps in Kid’s bed.
Another variation of this game is me on the floor in Kid’s room blocking Kid from leaving his bed, my partner in the regular bed, the cat downstairs in the bed downstairs. This is an old version of the game and we don’t practice it so often as my self-esteem and my back couldn’t take the floor sleeping anymore.
In the past, Musical Beds had a different moniker, Sardines. Specifically, Giant Sardine (me) and Little Sardine (Kid) where Giant Sardine and Little Sardine would pack, pack oh so tightly into the crib. I found out about this game from one of our family doctors who has given birth around the same time as me and mentioned it when we discussed sleeping woes. Hey, I thought, she’s a doctor, she must know what she’s doing. Wrong, of course. She was just insane from sleep deprivation.
Anyway, this is funny because it’s true.